madeira rocks. yup. nao preocupes.

Hey family!!

This week was lovely! we had the baptism of Eduíno, a great training and interviews with President (which of course was exactly what I needed), I had a great personal chat with Sister Flukiger, and then we had a great district conference with the district of the whole island of Madeira. There are some really amazing members here. 

One of the parts of the conference that stood out the most to me was a talk given by a 12 or 13 year old kid. He was amazing. He gave a really great talk and I feel pretty certain that he wrote it himself. A lot of the conference from Saturday had focused on doing the little things (reading the scriptures, teaching in the home to do family prayer, family home evening. ya know, the basics). They focused on family and the obligations parents have to their kids and kids to their parents and all of us as a ward family. and then we got to see what the effect of teaching in the home really has on kids. This kid gave an amazing talk. I think I learned as much or more from him as the other adult members who spoke. He picked his own topic and he told about how his mom taught him to  (and had him take) care of his grandfather when he was sick. and his grandpa couldn't really talk but he could see in his eyes that he was always really grateful. then he passed away and on the first time that he went to the temple he was able to be baptized for his grandpa. and this little kid got choked up telling this all in his own words in that moment. He had been taught and given the opportunity to develop Christ like charity and develop a relationship with his grandfather. and then taught the doctrines of temples and family history and family relationships and how temple ordinances and physically taking care of his grandpa were both equally part of following the savior's example and gospel and having his charity for those around us.

So that was cool.
 

Eduíno's baptism was really great too, because 1-he was super happy and brought some of his family members who we haven't been able to talk to yet, 2- because a recent converts gave all the talks and prayers and even baptized him, 3- because Sister Beard was super patient with me even as I was getting stressed and obnoxious in trying to figure out everything for the baptism. I have the best companion in the best area with some of the best members ever. :)
 

Also, the elders in our ward are going to have 7 baptisms next Saturday (they are freaking bosses), so we are stoked for that and I am going to be making a lot of cookies :) One of them knows Jeremy and Jonny. His name is Elder Stratford (or probably more well known to you as Sam Stratford). He's freaking legit. all that work he's doing while training. so we are going to do a lot of good in this ward this transfer. :)

Well that was kind of a lot of random info, but hopefully there was something useful in there. you guys are wonderful and I love you all. Have a great week and tell everyone that you are thankful for them and why this month (if its sincere:)
 

Thanksgiving! I can't wait! We'll celebrate ourselves since they don't really do that here. And then Christmas! I put up the Christmas tree sally sent and I can barely wait to open all the letters. they're all at the base of the tree in order. haha.
 

Well I love you all and have a really great week. 

Love,

Steph \ Sister Lofgreen

Living In Paradise--Oct 29, 2013

Hey family. Sorry for not writing yesterday I was in buses and cars and on an airplane and then on more buses and cars. And now I'm living in freaking paradise. Literally one of the best vacation spots out here on this side of the world. I am on the island Madeira, and this morning as I went running I had an ocean breeze in my face green mountains that disappear into clouds on my right and the ocean on my right. It is amazing. and on top of that I came to a great branch with an amazing companion. I am really so excited to be serving with her. in the couple of lessons that we have taught together so far I am just so excited to be serving with her. plus things and home and in planning and in pretty much everything are just chill. And on top of that I am in the same house as Sister Call, my companion (that I trained) from Viseu, who I just love with all my heart. She is going to be training this transfer (her 5th which ironically is exactly the transfer that I was in when I trained her) and the sister she will be training is portuguese. which is awesome. because it means that we are all going to be able to work on our accents. 

Here in Madeira the people have an accent that is a bit different and sometimes it throughs me off a bit. I think I can understand Portuguese really quite well at this point in my mission, but sometimes, here, things still just go right over my head. So that will be a fun adventure. I hope to be able to perfect my portuguese accent and bring along a few good impressions of the Madeiran. We'll see how it goes.

But as for this last week.....

I can't write because apparently we only have 30 min for email... so yeah..~

até proximo. 

Love you guys.

stay sweet (hotrod)

Sister Lofgreen\Steph

October 21. 2013

Hey family,

I am alive and well. I'm really sorry that I didn't write anything yesterday. I had a few minutes to get on email in the morning last week, but I thought I would have more time later so I didn't say anything and then we didn't get a chance to go back the whole day, so it just didn't work out. I'm sorry. But I do love you guys. I will try to give you a good update of everything that's been going on with me, but that might be hard to get all the details. The mission is a very strange time warp and in the work, sometimes two weeks can feel like an eternity. I can't believe that it was just last week that we were at the doctor for Sister Parker. We went down to Lisboa to go to a doctor with Sister Flukiger to see if a real adult could get them to do something more effective. And it worked! She's the best. Plus she has a car, so that helps. and she took us to the american store where they have the Montreal Steak and Chicken seasonings that I love. I got her to buy some so I could put some in little baggies to take home (they're a little pricey over here.) Other novelties of the american store, kitchen aid, big jars of peanut butter, Reese's, root beer, fruit roll-ups, yummy pop corn, Ramen, mac and cheese, yummy granola bars, Crisco and lots of other things you probably wouldn't think of. But of all the american luxuries, I think the one I miss the most is a dryer. Luckily, I got to go use one at the laundry mat today, so this p-day is looking pretty up. :)

We are working with some really great families right now. and that's what every missionary dreams about--families.One is this lady named Neusa, her son Flavio (8), Ires (5) and Francisco (2) and her husband Alfonso. We met Neusa in the street about a month ago and tried to pass by a couple of times and she was just not having it. She wasn't home several times and then we went by one day and the door to the apartment complex was open and her husband answered the door and she did not want to let us in, but I think they weren't getting along and he let us in just to spite her. We got her to say a prayer with us and left and came back another day. She didn't want to let us in once again but we just kept talking for a little bit, said a prayer and then she let us come in and sit down. We sang a hymn with the kids and they loved it and we marked to come back another day. And then after a while, she really wanted us to come back and we finally got to teach her the first lesson last week. She started off the lesson by saying how she doesn't think her baptism was just like Christ's and she's not sure what to do about it. She has so many questions and really wants to follow Christ and help her kids grow up in the right way. That reminds me of a really cool experience we had the other day with her. The time before we really got to teach her a real live lesson this last week, we went over on a day when only her and Flavio (who's 8) were home. He was mad at her (a mom of three very lively kids sometimes yells and her kids don't always like it..) and he was sitting on the couch and refusing to look at or respond to anyone. Then we had Neusa say a prayer. and it was the most sincere, beautiful, Spirit-led, loving prayer I have ever heard an investigator say (well maybe not, we a really great investigator in Loulé who prayed kind of like that too). And she just expressed her love for her children and God and her desire to teach them what's right and do her best for them and for God to be near him and after the prayer Flavio totally changed. He just kind of looked at his mom awe-struck. Like he had no idea she had all those emotions inside of her. He was so moved and changed for the rest of the lesson. After that he had to go sit on his mom's lap and just hug her for like the rest of the time we were there. And it just really strengthened my testimony of family prayer and how as we focus on the Lord and on turning our hearts to Him, He is the one who can really bring us closer together. Turning to God does more to bless our families and our family relationships than anything else we can do, because He knows us and them and knows the thoughts and intents of their hearts and if He's the choreographer things always run more smoothly. I'm working on learning to apply that in my relationships with people her, with members and especially with my companion. The mission is really one of the greatest things ever invented for turning us into good people. Its the best training ground for service in the church, for having a successful life, for marriage and parenthood, for pretty much everything. I don't think its a coincidence that more and more youth are serving at this time when things in the world are getting more and more difficult. We need that strength in the church, not just in the mission field. We need more leaders, people who will lead and stand for righteousness and work and do many things of their own free will in what ever situation they are put in, not just when put in positions of "leadership." I'm working on that.

They more I learn, the farther it feels like I have to go, but that is sometimes a tool of the adversary too. My friend sent me a quote from another friend one time that said something like this "Whenever you get discouraged, take a moment to look back and see how far you've come." I have to recognize the progress I have been making because every time I do, I'm giving credit to the one who deserves it, the one who created this plan and the more specific plan for my life of challenges and blessings designed to help me, specifically, grow. 

Well there were lots of other things that happened this week, but I think I'll stop here unless I get a moment to come back later and write about them. I love-you all and i am so proud of each of you. tell me what's going on with you. I really do love to hear about it.

Oh yeah, other big thing, we had a baptism (I don't have pics cause I lost my camera... :(  This man named Paulo was baptized. He was brought to church by his girlfriend who is headed back to Paraguay (which most certainly borders Uruguay through Argentina's border) next week. It was great because he brought his whole family and they were all so happy and crying and so happy for him (hopefully we can start teaching all of them this week). And in Gospel Principles he taught the plan of salvation to the whole class so incredibly well. So that was a really great moment this week as well.

And about a millennium before that (aka Wednesday) we got to go do divisions in Viseu again! but with the other dupla this time. and I got to go with my lovely companion from the MTC! Sister Warburton! and that was a really fun day... but once again, no pictures.. sorry. I just love getting to love so many new people every transfer, every day. I want to remember and love that more. Some things I learned\relearned from her that day.

Really find AND talk about the good in everyone. 

The secret to being happy is being grateful. 

"I love the challenge of learning to love a new person."

"you have to love people into the gospel."

Geez. that girl is just a treasure trove of wisdom. her and Hillary Bowler. my equivalent of a magic eight ball for my life is conference, Sister Warburton, and Hillary Bowler. I swear it works. (ok, maybe I should go study personal revelation a bit more. that's probably not how it works.)

I am working on letters to lots of people! I'm sorry I'm so slow! I haven't done a great job of making time this transfer, but I will try better this week. (I have letters for Hillary and Jessica started and a big list for lots of other people, so don't hate me :)

I love you all and I hope I didn't forget anything terribly important, but if so Heavenly Father will remind me later. 

Love,

Steph

P.S. fight the good fight!

Sept. 2, 2013

Hey family!
So this week was good and I made a list of things to tell you about, but now I don't know what I actually want to say.
The list makes it so that I am not thinking about the things that I learned and processing how I changed and grew this week, so hopefully I will get a chance to think about that this week too.
This week had lots of individual things happen where Ifeel like I learned and grew and did things right and did things wrong and they haven't all melded together in my mind yet to one or two or three over arching lessons that needed to learn.
But some things I was thinking about yesterday in fast and testimony meeting. The power of people's testimonies really is not at all dependent on their speaking abilities. They are carried to our hearts by the Spirit and their strength is much more dependent on the consistent role that those principles play in the people's lives. For example, the most powerful testimonies that I heard were one by this little old man who didn't really say that much, I don't think he actually even mentioned Christ in his talk, he just said how important it is to stay strong in the church and in the gospel. and I know that he feels that and lives that and relies more on the strength of Christ's atonement from that simple statement than so many eloquent people that I talk to that don't make the simple, good, daily decisions in their lives that he does.  read the scriptures every day. pray every day. talk to god like he's your father because he really is. love the people around you with all of your actions to the best of your ability because they are god's children too. work every day to build the kingdom of god on the earth. (that includes most especially everything we do for our families [aka studying and working to be able to take care of our families and future families]).
and I was thinking about how callings--working and serving in God's kingdom here on the earth--is one of the best ways that we have to learn and grow and CHOOSE to be humble instead of being forced to be humble like alma talks about in the beginning of alma 32.* That's really hard. and it comes in little choices. like this one from this amazing talk by Elder Bednar (that everyone in the world should read. I heard it in the MTC and I still think about it ALL THE TIME. it absolutely changed my life because it changed my daily choices and the way I see things and the things I am working to, ou seja, it made me want to work harder and more specifically to be like the savior.)


Elder Bednar's Talk: "On the day of her daughter's funeral, this Relief Society president from my home ward received a phone call from an irritated sister in our ward. The complaining sister had a cold and did not feel well, and she basically chewed out the Relief Society president for not being thoughtful or compassionate enough to arrange for meals to be delivered to her home. Just hours before the funeral of her only child, this remarkable Relief Society president prepared and delivered a meal to the murmuring sister."

These amazing people, quietly making decisions to put themselves last, even when they are perfectly justified in being offended or angry or in taking a moment to take care of themselves are those who change the world through their love and example.
 anyways.. on to some stories of things that happened this week.
 We had a baptism!
F. This super awesome lady who with every time she has specifically prayed about a question has found an answer. I think I talked about her a little while back. well, she finally picked a date to get baptized last week and then on tuesday we moved it up to this saturday and she got baptized and received the Holy Ghost on Sunday and it was amazing because it was one of those moments when you know that SHE really knew what she was doing and that it was important in her life. and she got up and bore her testimony in sacrament meeting after and it was awesome.

Another awesome little miracle from Saturday was that 7 of our investigators showed up at her baptism! which was sweet. and even better, the members really made an effort to make each and every one of them feel welcome.
I was called to Portugal, but sometimes I feel like I'm serving in Africa, because most of our investigators are from Capo Verde, Angola, and Mozambique. and at the moment a lot of them are 19-25 yr old boys who like to play futebol by the river every day and so we just get them to come have lessons with us when they stop playing. Because of this, Sunday night after church we were still fasting and we had about an hour to go look for new investigators and we had planned to go to this park by the chapel. And because we had been joking about our stereotype investigator, we just walked by this kid who fit it perfectly without really talking to him, we just said hi as we passed by, but then he stopped us and was like "hey, are you from the church?" and we just kept talking to him for a while. We started teaching him the first lesson and in the middle he just interrupts us and is like 'when you guys said hi to me I felt something really strong. This really strong feeling, like you are creatures of God (which really at the moment and in português was way less weird...) and I have that feeling right now, like nothing bad could happen. did you get that feeling?" and so we talked about the spirit and how to recognize it and how we feel when we feel the spirit, but it was just one of those moments, those tender mercies, that Heavenly Father gives you to let you know that what you're doing is important and that the Spirit really is guiding you and that there really are people prepared all over the world to hear our message. Sometimes we just have to start talking and we might not have the right words to us, but the spirit can take care of things if we just open our mouths.
Oh and my companion and I each got proposed to twice this week.. that's always fun... and by that I mean its not at all fun. One of them decided I was prejudiced against Muslims because I wouldn't marry him after having met him 5 minutes before hand.. and it doesn't help when your ward mission leader decides to tell one of them that you can date them when you're done with your mission in a year and a half... don't worry he didn't mean it and he owned a fight club, so I think he can help us out.
Also.. I'm having a hard time being exactly obedient because everyone keeps handing me black babies (my ward mission leader an his wife for example). pictures attached.
And I better go so that I can get some other things done today, but I love you all so so so so so so very much. and i want you to always remembre it and study the words of the prophets and apply something every day and forgive me if I didn't say anything that I needed to and trust the Spirit to help you know what you need to say when you need to say it.
Have a great week!!!!
And read that Elder Bednar talk. here's the link one more time:
Love you!
 Steph\ Sister Lofgreen
P.S. Fight the good fight. and remembre what's most important (always people).
And take my mom's advice this week and always try to be present the moment. that's my goal for the week.
p.p.s. I left our phone at Pablo's last night and we had to run through the city after hours to get it and then cal the zone leaders to tell them we were late and why after having had to cal them earlier that day to give lots of excuses for why we didn't get Fatima's baptismal ficha signed. we are awesome...

August 19, 2013

Sometimes my dad says really profound things that sound like their coming out of a book. like this: ".. but again, to everything it's season. . . . Can't I just have a little control of the seasons? . . . Nah, it'd always be fall with the colored leaves and with a touch of chill in the air. As much as I like that now, it might get a little boring after a couple of years. :)

Hey family. I love you guys so so so very much.
I don't think you guys understand it, but I really love you so much more every day that I am here. And not because I miss you (I do miss you, but that's ok), but because I feel that I am getting better and better at being a good person (I still have so so so so so so so far to go) but I think that the more I serve the Lord the more I learn about Him and more I learn to love Him and the more I learn the importance of the love He has for us and all of these things just make me love each and every one of you guys that much more, because I know that we are going to be family for ever and because I feel some of Heavenly Father's love for you. And families like ours are so so rare, especially when you are not living in the middle of the gospel culture, a culture where families love each other.
But anyway, this week was good. We are working with this lady F, who is really cool. She's really logical, but the amazing thing is that we just left her with invites to pray about really specific simple things (book of mormon, joseph smith, baptism,..) one after each lesson and each time, we would come back and she wouldn't say that she got an answer but the she would explain to us why it makes sense that the book of mormon is true and how much she loved reading it and the sign God gave her that its important,and then  explain why it makes sense that God would call prophets, and everytime like that. She would reason out the answer, but because she had asked and wanted to know her doubts were answered and her fears were calmed. She did her part and the Lord knew her and how to help her with her doubts in the way that worked for her. So often we don't see how the Lord works with us but those on the outside do.
Its amazing how consistent people are. When we go into a lesson 99% of the time I know if someone read and prayed or not just on their attitude about meeting with us. You can tell if they have been reading in the Book of Mormon (even if they didn't understand the whole chapter, you can tell whether or not they exercized their faith enough to just sit down and sincerely read) so quickly and easily.
I love Alma 26:22:
22 Yea, he that repenteth and exerciseth faith, and bringeth forth good works, and prayeth continually without ceasing—unto such it is given to know the mysteries of God; yea, unto such it shall be given to ereveal things which never have been revealed; yea, and it shall be given unto such to bring thousands of souls to repentance, even as it has been given unto us to bring these our brethren to repentance. l
I love it because it is to those who have faith, repent and live the basic principles of the gospel that God will give understanding of the mysteries we are all seeking to understand in this life. And you can really see how true that is in the lives of other people. Why then is it so hard for us to do the little things that will let us understand the hard questions: why bad things happen to good people, why life is hard, what god wants from us, what we are here to do, how to be happy. the things that matter.
But as for F., pray for her to resolve her doubts. She's so close and she will bring so much good into the lives of all her family if she can get through this period of doubt.
Well I better close so my comp can use the computer too today.. But I love you so so so so so much.
Please read your scriptures, pray,  love people, do good things and just be a good person. Its really the little things that make and break us.
And as for all the little things that we still have a hard time with: the Atonement is real and it works. (I heard a cool story about that too. an elder who really offended a girl who is a member here now. I happen to know this elder and know that he had really changed and that he would never want that. but she was sent the people in her life to help her overcome that trial that she had and now she has an amazing testimony and her sister too. The Savior took care of the things that he couldn't do because he really repented and changed and became better and trusted in the Lord.)
I love you guys so so so so much!!!!!!
Sorry I'm always such mess in my emails.

Steph

P.S.
Paul!!!! Awesome talk! you are amazing you and your testimony of the gospel already inspire me!!! (your future wife is one lucky young lady, haha, but seriously your testimony of the priesthood and womanhood is wonderful.)

Jeremy, Elder (Sam) Stratford says hi. He says he knows you and Jonny.
Also go watch 3 Ninjas for me. I used to always want to watch that show but couldn't remember what it was. What are you planning for this fall? Are you going back to Elmira? working?

Is school starting soon for everybody?

July 29, 2013

Hey family!

This week I felt like I learned \ knew a lot about how to be happy. Ironically enough it came from not always being happy.
I love that scripture (I think its about Ammon) in Alma 27:18 where all the Sons of Mosiah and Alma run into each other again and Ammon (or Alma, I just cant remember at the moment) passes out (why are they always doing that in the Book of Mormon) from being filled with joy greater than his body could bear and then it says "18 Now was not this exceeding joy? Behold, this is joy which none receiveth save it be the truly penitent and humble seeker of happiness."
 I just love that Heavenly Father loves us enough to give us specific directions about how to be happy. He doesn't just say go be happy he tells us exactly how, He gives us commandments and shows us how through examples of people around us, through prophets, through people in the scriptures, and most of all through Christ's example. And for people like me who need things to be written out a little more specifically he has it written over and over and over in thousands of scriptures, not to mention living prophets and priesthood leaders and parents and inspired friends. God loves us so much, so much more that we can possibly imagine.
Everybody sent me such great emails today. I always learn so much on pdays its almost stressful because I know I'm not going to be able to remember it all because I can't remember everything from the pday before.
But I still love it and am so grateful for it because the spirit can bring things back to my remembrance in exactly the moment that I need them.
We had some really awesome things happen this week. And by things I really mean people because that is always the awesome part in the mission. Earlier this week we met this girl who wasn't super interested, but then we got her phone number and then called her up and she agreed to meet with us and then we had a really awesome lesson and then she stayed to go to the baptism of these two little boys in our ward and then she really really liked it and was really thinking about it and really taking things in and just really really thinking and then she went home and read the chapter in the book of mormon that we talked about and then prayed about it that night and she feels like its true and then she came to church the next morning! and its amazing how quickly things can change on the mission.
 We also had a lesson with a --
Also we teach her in english-portuguese because she speaks perfect english and she says she thinks in english and she wanted us to speak in english, but sometimes I just can't teach in english so I switch to portuguese and sometimes my comp teaches in english and I teach in portuguese and its cool. But mostly it was cool because this week in training the new missionary is supposed to lead and it was not necessarily the best moment for that because we were dealing with some other issues as a companionship (nothing even bad, just that made it complicated to try to switch up roles) and it was making things kind of tense. But because we were teaching in english (sort of) Sister C felt totally comfortable just going for it and taking on that role (she's really good at it, she is such an awesome missionary [I am like 90% certain that she is going to have one more transfer doing something else and then just be a Sister Training Leader for the rest of her mission so that everyone else in mission can just learn from her]). Heavenly Father knows our needs and since He knows we need to have the experiences in the training He provides for those needs, He even makes up for our weaknesses. Back to the Sister C is awesome tangent-- last night we did this cool activity with the other sisters and the elders from our ward and we went to this big open area by the camara(city hall) and sang hymns and had other missionaries contacting the whole time and we had a table and posters and it was awesome. but one of the most awesoem things was Sister C went off contacting with Sister S who is in her first transfer and terrified of Portuguese and it was just so cool to see her in her element leading everything so happily and excitedly almost running after people in the cutest most excited way that they didn't even mind and then just so happily helping Sister S along with everything and giving her advice  and stuff. I am realizing that probably none of this means very much to you guys but they are just moments that make me happy. so yeah. :)
This week I copied and pasted from this letter to president, but I additioned this so I will just put it here too :)
And we had two investigators in church who were good solid investigators to have in church, people searching for the truth and to change their lives who came to church for those reasons, so that was really really cool.
In our studies we reviewed How to Begin Teaching and studied teaching skills from chapter 10 (questions, listening, using scriptures, and teaching for understanding). We also reviewed the second lesson and teaching more simply (basically applying those principles we were studying) because it seems to be the one we have the hardest time helping investigators grasp as a whole (so we need to know it and teach it better).
Did you know how cool the gospel is! It makes so much sense! It all just fits together so simply and perfectly and I love Alma 12.
I pray for you every day.  (especially every week) and I KNOW that Heavenly Father is watching out for you so I will keep trusting Him and you can trust in my testimony of that truth like I am trusting in Mom's that:
Psalms 46 "God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble." He really is my refuge and my strength.  I pray He will be yours.
I love you so much!
Have a wonderful week!
Fight the good fight!
The gospel's true!
Let God's will be done!(that's for you Hannahpants --don't ask me where that name came from-- I love love love love loved your email by the way. You are so profound lately and I love that the gospel is sinking into your heart.
Love
Steph \ Sister Lofgreen

July 22,2013

Hey family!!! I'm sorry that I didn't really get a real email written this week! I just wrote more to more people individually, so I'm osrry about that, but I would like to copy and paste some random things from some random places that I liked and call it my own, pode ser? Fixe.
Things I learned from people this week:
Fight the good fight.
Missionary opportunities come up for everyone and the more ready we are the more we will be able to recognize them and meet them.
"I have been thinking lately about how many times God has lifted me to be able to do what is required.  I am so grateful for my years in school and then even this past year.  I do know that all things are possible with God. I am so grateful for this knowledge.  I am so grateful for your great example.  Keep the faith and try today to listen to the spirit as He tells you who to help." --not just what to do, but WHO to help. I liked that. and I'm glad that I know that my mom knows the gospel's true.  Even if I don't always have the testimony of that buried deep down in my soul the way I want it to be, I do know with out a shadow of a doubt that you know it. like that scripture about the stripling warriors. They knew their mothers knew it. If we can rely on the faith of our mothers, I think I will make it :)
Things I said that I want everyone to know:
Fight the good fight.
Me and my companion had some nice bonding experiences this week and I really felt the confirming presence of Heavenly Father telling me : See, I really did know what I was doing by sending you here and putting you guys together and giving you the talents and the weaknesses and personality that you have.
I like to know that God really does know me and He really does love me and value my gifts and abilities and talents enough to use them in his service.
Sorry this is really really short, but I love you all so much and there's always next week!

Steph\Sister Lofgreen


Mom!
You are the greatest most loving mother I could ever hope for in the world. . . and I'm turing into you a little bit in some ways that I don't like, like thinking that everything is my fault and taking responsiblity for way more than I could reasonably be accountable for, but I hope if that is becoming a part of me, maybe I am becoming a little bit more like you in one of a thousand other ways that I want to be. Like willingness to put faith into action. Remember when you decided you were going to go get a job and you had all these goals for youself and were taking those classes from the church place and going to talk to Bishop Ship and Jeff Edwards and applying for so many jobs in the world and just doing so many things and I was just like what? How do you just get a job? Well, that idea of just going and doing things that you have shown me so many times in my life, to just be a problem solver, I finally get where you learned that since being on the mission-- sometimes you just have to go do things. And I'm grateful to see how mission experiences have contributed to some of the amazing things that I have learned from you. Because now I know that it will really truly have an effect on my kids, cause your mission had an effect on me.

Last week, Sister B started reading me a literary offering she received from one of her old teachers. Guess who? Zack Hutchins! Funny right! And guess what the literary offering was: To My Dear and Loving Husband by Ann Bradstreet.
It made me really really happy because it made me think of you.

Mom, I am so so so grateful for the many things that you have taught me and that you taught me just now as I read that letter. I am grateful that because of you I know that with God all things are possible. Even if I don't always have the testimony of that buried deep down in my soul the way I want it to be, I do know with out a shadow of a doubt that you know it. Like that scripture about the stripling warriors. They knew their mothers knew it. If we can rely on the faith of our mothers, I think I will make it :)
Don't ever for a moment forget how much I love you and how proud I am to have you as my mother. :)
I will keep praying for you to know what to do about the house and the move and the family and all of these things. I will pray that you and dad will be able to feel united in the decisions that you are making, because no matter what happens if that's true, it will work out. and even more, if you can feel at peace with Heavenly Father with the choices you are making it will work out. so I will pray for you both to know what to do for yourselves and the family.
I love you so much.
Love Steph